To be fearless is not possible. We all have fears, especially those deep-seeded fears that we’re not lovable or significant. What matters is the quality of our relationship to these fears and to our thoughts. Do we let them control us? Do they run our lives? Do they hold us back? Do they limit us? Do they keep us from our dreams? Do they detain us from our potential?
They can. You see how this is not a definite yes or no. That my friends is because it’s a choice. One that we make. Do we not take a risk and go after our dreams, because we’re afraid of rejection or failing or being perceived as a failure? I have all kinds of fears. In recent years I’ve uncovered some I’ve had for a long time, but was never even aware they were holding me back. Example I’ve realized I am afraid of being along, I won’t have a committed relationship or family (in this instance hiding and not letting people in held me back).
More recently I have discovered you can have a playful relationship with your fears. Acknowledge them. Acknowledge the fear-based thoughts and then choose differently. For instance I have had a bike issue since I was 7 years-old. This year I read Add More ~ing (Gabby Bernstein) and I chose biking for my ~ing activity. Fast forward to this summer when I decided to become a commuter, biking being my main means of getting around. Now everyone at my new job jostles me about my bike riding and asks what I like to do besides bike. How does a girl who avoided bikes for most of her life end up being know for biking? How do I now log over a 100 miles in a week? How do have I gotten up to 20 miles per hour a bike? How do I ride at night (I confess here I was afraid of the dark growing up)? Because I decided to have fun with my fears. Because I acknowledged my fears. Because I committed to a lifestyle. Because I decided I loved my bicycle. Occasionally, especially on a hill, you’ll see the fear flare up, but I am better at catching myself before it controls me.
Do it! Turn your fears into fun. I’m afraid of heights, I went skydiving. I’m afraid of being vulnerable. I’m afraid of being judged. I’m afraid of what people with think. I’m afraid my writing won’t resonate with anyone. With all these going on, I still hit publish every week on this blog. I share myself. I share my heart. I share soul. I open myself up to anyone to see and judge, but I share anyway. I’m afraid of my dreams. I’m afraid they won’t happen. I’m afraid they will happen. But I keep at it. I keep submitting my application. Now I am in the market. I keep putting myself out there. I keep putting my dreams out there. I keep putting my food and myself out there. This is me. Yes there’s that naked vulnerability feeling, but there’s the passion and drive when you live with purpose. Fear-based thoughts will enter your brain flow, what do you chose? How about a little fun?