Excuse #4: There will be family drama.
I love my family. I love my friends and I love Indiana. The thing with environments and people we have known for so long as there is so much built in conditioning. We have definitions and an image in our head of how we expect them to be. It’s natural, as we become creatures of habits, so we know how someone is. The problem is that we can change. Any moment we can change our thoughts. We can change ourselves. So when we have these conditioned thoughts, we are still holding that image of who they are. We don’t allow them to express this new thought or new self. We hinder, rather than support their change because we have already decided how they should or do act.
Sometimes we make assumptions from these thoughts. We act out of fear. Real life example: I’ve got to talk to dad my car broke down in Denver. Prior conditioning tells me that this could upset him, that he’ll get mad at me. So let’s not give him a chance. Let’s hide it. Let’s deal with all by ourselves.
Wrong, by assuming there will be drama or a fight or anger nothing gets resolved. He cannot change. I cannot change. The issue cannot get resolved. So once again, just like before, I let it go. I expel the fear. I expel the anticipation that there will be drama. I present myself. I present the facts. I open up. I am honest. The excuse was wrong. Talking eased my concern. He was not upset with me. He was not upset at all, but conditioned thought or excuses could have prevented me from talking to him. Fear and memes could get in the way of moving on, from finding resolutions.
Fearing family drama or using it as an excuse doesn’t allow us to change. It doesn’t allow anyone else to change. Drop the excuse. Don’t anticipate a reaction or put them in a box. Yes there may still be drama. Don’t feel that you should or have to be a certain way for them because you assume there will be judgment or conflict in being yourself and pursuing your dreams. Let them be. Be yourself. Be honest. Be open. Give them unconditional love and acceptance. Be forgiving.
BE, Love, Illuminate,
- Expelling Excuses (bepaulin.wordpress.com)