Lately I’ve been evaluating and expanding on my personal relationships, one that I have been working on and one of those one’s filled with memes, is the relationship that I have with my sister. I’ll admit we had a rough start. Amanda is seven years older than me, and Cliff is only a year, so growing up me and Cliff were always paired together and Amanda was up there on her own. I judged her. To a younger me she was stuck-up, always ratting on me and Cliff, while also nosing into our business. Always parading herself as the pretty one, I instantly let myself fall into the artsy/smart sister role. Meme number one, my sister is pretty, therefore I am not, so I am uncomfortable around her. I admit when I was younger, everyone was always telling me how pretty Amanda was and jealousy ran deep in my insecure and spiritually lacking frame. But as I grew (and with my post soon coming on beauty) and especially since I’ve been on my spiritually journey I’ve come to realize my own self-value and my current self-love will not allow such negative thoughts to come (although I find it odd, because my sister does have people who judge her based on looks and we all seem to be insecure and afraid of beauty). The major turning part in our relationship came, however, my senior year of high school when she coached her softball team and we were able to spend more time together as ourselves. Since then we have both grown and matured into adulthood on parallel paths. If you would have told me that we would have a relationship like this when I was ten, I would have said you were high. Especially the last year, last summer I was at their house all the time: going on bike rides, crashing on their coach, going to the Woelfle’s pool, boring her clothes for a date and getting ready there. Sunday’s at her house were a guarantee. Now I can pop in anytime they’re home and it doesn’t have to be to play with the boys. One afternoon their neighbor played with the boys while me and Amanda watched Mansfield Park and took a trip to Walmart. It was relaxing and effortless. We took a day and I went to the doctor with her, before taking the boys to the Children’s Museum and basketball game. My favorite part was the car ride. We are able to talk about anything now. I feel comfortable talking about anything with here: business, boys, mom and dad, life, anything. I was able to ask her about her illnesses. And this is something that I noticed with mom, like it was something I didn’t really want to ask, but the voice in my head said I was the person that needed to ask her, to get off both of our chests (just like I had to be the one to talk to mom about drinking). And you know what? It wasn’t as difficult as I played it out to be. We talked openly and honestly about it and were able to move. Being on this journey (which she pokes fun at my relentless expressions and writings of cards and such) I can appreciate her for who she is: not only a physically stunning woman, but someone who shines through, a great mother, wife, sister, daughter, coach and teacher. We have this open relationship, but we are able to remain true to ourselves which can be silly and likes to have fun. We can go joke and shake our way through a zumba class together or what not. I am so thankful for the progress we have made and to our current state and can only imagine what it will develop into. I love her!
BE, Love, Illuminate,