Tears, as I walk around the park today, I find the most corners of my eyes moisten with them. This is something seems to be reoccurring lately. But why? Tears get such a bad wrap. They represent weakness, over-emotion, un-stability, pain; or at least this is what I thought when my ego was behind the wheels. Like this single act made you vulnerable, subject to judgement or forcing you to face emotions and feelings head on. Younger it was always ‘suck it up’ and priding myself on never letting anyone see me cry, that I was somehow stronger for this. Really all I was doing was compressing emotions, keeping them hidden deep inside, so at once they could swoop in, envelop me and strangle me with overwhelming feelings and sickness that I had long suppressed in my front to be ‘tough’. Why would we have tear ducts if we were not intended to use them? What did I realize today? Tears are beautiful. There prevalence nowadays is not weakness, but part of my inspiration. They represent the absolute joy and peace I feel. Today I was thinking of something my mother had said and then the remembrance of Tab sending me a text Sunday that only said I love you, yet brought tears to my eyes because even though I’m always doing this for people in my life it takes my breath away when somebody does it to me. When I think sometimes I’m being overbearing with my I love you’s and letters, I think of how much this means to me and what it feels like to give love and receive it in return (there is no other comparison), and I listen to my mom that when I stop could be when they need it the most and maybe they feel that same heart tug that I feel. These tears today are love,
I’ve said it before, but hiking is like my little sacred time. It’s my centering, my walking meditation or mindfulness. I fully believe in the Nature Principle and the ever-so-important vitamin N (clearly another reference to nature here). It’s a way of getting close to my Source again, to fully regain my inspiration and listen to my intuition and challenge myself (or actually to just reconnect with myself). Being a little nature deprived lately, I’ve found myself hesitant to get my butt out there, but it doesn’t take long to get back into sync, as the sun is a gentle reminder. So I’m silent, just soaking it all in, not thinking of where I’m supposed to go, who I’m supposed to be or what I should do. I walk, aimlessly around and it isn’t long that I hear that voice, ‘take off your shoes.’ I don’t even question. I walk a little further making sure to smile and send loving thoughts to all those I pass. As I turn around I pause at a tree to Continue reading
I love little tasks or projects (or the process of them, as I discussed yesterday). My newest one is my journal ‘Getting Grateful’. I start or end the day, or randomly write in it things that I’m thankful for. It can be simple like breathing or a person or a chance meeting or a seemingly sucky situation like falling in the mud and the ability to laugh at myself. Catch myself in the act of living and embracing. The thoughts instantly put me back in inspiration, as I realize all the things I do have, now what’s ‘missing.’ I reconnect to my source, as feelings of love and kindness surge through my body. I feel truly alive as I give thanks for something simple like my heart beating. My ego is tucked securely away and I am ready to take on the day, to think and serve others, to Be myself, Be Happy, to Be grateful, to laugh, to radiate kindness and love, to see beauty unfolding around me, to not judge but extend compassion, to live in awe and bewilderment of each moment transcending Continue reading
I have to admit that I was apprehensive about reading the Tao of Pooh, thus comes the folly of anticipation. I thought it was genius, clever, witty, clear, simple and whatever divine adjectives you want to insert.
Life is Fun
As soon as I got to this, I thought “I never have to read another inspirational book again, this is it.” Life is what you make it. If you’re stressed and miserable, it is because you made it that way. I have this wonderful saying above the computer at work that says, ‘there’s no such thing as stress; there only people thinking stressful thoughts.’ What in life is fun then? The process. Not the goals or rewards but the moments in between. the moment right before eating the honey is better than actually consuming it. We’ve got to enjoy the in-between moments. The silent pauses between conversations, add up to being. Next, thrive in the nothing. This I’ve launched myself in to. No plans or thoughts for tomorrow just right now. It’s amazing not only how pleasurable it is to do nothing rather than doing what we’re ‘supposed’ to or behaving how we ‘should, but it’s amazing how much gets done! Your life is right here, right now, heaven is here right now. It’s not some dream or fantasy about some Continue reading
I’ve been struggling with concept the last month or so. I go through phases in my spiritual journey: opportunity, Being (always on-going), non-judgment (also always present), love, beauty, and so on, but this one has taken me more time. Most of my other paths have significant events linked to them or epiphanies, and this one I’ve thought about, but had a harder time wrapping my head around. Connectedness, this part I get the easiest. Like with love and with my Dr. Dyer readings, I see myself in others, and therefore must love them like I love myself. We all come from this infinite source (call it what you want, call it god, that depends on your beliefs). We all have the same basic physical needs, but emotional, as well. I think that ultimately we all strive to be better, whether we ‘succeed’ at that or not vary. We all struggle and battle with this, but like Anne Frank said: Despite everything, I believe people are really good at heart. I remember Continue reading
I’ve been in a spiritual funk the last week. As a result the last week I find myself talking (maybe I like the sound of my voice better, but really I think that my ego, which I normally keep a tighter grip on pulled a Houdini escape act). Where to begin? Friday I wake to a text that we have an emergency meeting. My father is leaving the business and ownership is turned over to me and mom. Ok, I saw change coming, not really what I envisioned but I’m confident in the two of us and my own destiny. The split was amicable, but what upset me was that my dad got hurt. Note the first fall from my Brittanyspiritual cloud. Before this my father had received an email that he had offended someone, add in a long history of this kind of thing and my father’s realization that he is not happy in this building, but wants to go back to his one-on-one experiences with people that can handle him. I love my father dearly, but he is honest and he admits when people refuse his help he often attacks because his ego gets in the way (I like to say his approach is off or he lacks tact). He has a genuine heart though and people don’t realize all the changes he has made. I find myself struggling throughout the day, making my descent from the cloud to touch down in the ‘real’ world. Down to the real world where people judge and talk and take Continue reading